December 3, 2009

Plagiarists beware: Flunky flunky!

Posted in student stories, teaching revelations tagged , , , , , , , at 1:29 pm by profart

I hate it when students flunk. It’s bad on my nerves. I always feel like there is something more I should have done, something more I should have said. I agonize over placing the fat, honkin’ F on that record, especially with students who have at least warmed their seat all semester. But one must get what one earns, even if I lose a little sleep over it.

With one exception. Plagiarists. Don’t feel like doing footnotes? I’m going to flunk you, and not even bat an eye. Want to just copy material in from books, or cut and paste from websites? Flunky flunky! I just don’t tolerate theft of other people’s ideas and hard work, just because you are too frickin’ lazy to do your own.

With the citations thing, I give my kids a gentle second chance. Either I flip through the papers as they hand them in, and hand it back if there are no citations (or at least try to); or if they are emailed, I will send an email noting that I clearly have the wrong draft, and would they kindly email me the correct one, the one with citations? Because if that is not enough of a hint to correct the issue, they deserve to flunk for outright stupidity. We have enough thick-headed academics in the world, and I am sure if a couple professors had flunked their butts when they were being thick, instead of just passing them off to the next poor fool, we’d have a lot less of them.

There is nothing I consider more EPIC FAIL than failing to cite sources in a writing assignment, especially in upper-level courses, where it should be practically second nature. And I have one policy for EPIC FAIL: an F on your transcript.


August 8, 2009

Incoherent Student Strikes Again

Posted in student stories tagged , , , at 4:13 am by profart

These are the instructions:

Answer one question clearly, concisely, and completely. Use at least three works of art for examples, clarifying how the example is pertinent to your thesis in your writing. Each example must be identified by title, date, and country of origin. You must cover at least three major areas of art history. You must select at least one item from: Prehistoric, Ancient Near Eastern, Egyptian, Ancient Aegean, Greek, Etruscan, or Roman. You must select at least one item from: Early Christian, Byzantine, Islamic, Early Tribal/Early Medieval/Celtic, Carolingian, Ottonian, Romanesque, Gothic.

This is the question:

Light is a common metaphor for the divine. Discuss the use of light and its connection with religious and political art in the ancient and medieval worlds.

Here is the answer:

Light, by all means, is one of the most cherished sources man has worshipped, arranged their lives by and what our planet thrives from.

Since Ancient times man has used light to many of his advantages.

Before the light bulb was invented,
Before our towns, grew into cities, then those cities became even greater, cities OF LIGHT, with a touch of man’s manipulating hand, and the itelligence man is born with, Man mixes these amazing ideas which they come up with

and have brought them to LIFE. Sacrficing and labor intense work, with man hands, some pully’s and a wheel, GREAT STRUCTURES were built. OF course SUNLight, The ball of fire which man awakens with every morning is worshiped, thanked, cherished, and Is mandatory that it be shown In peoples areas of worship, giving thanks to the solar power that keeps motivation in the world Man has taken over with its various species.

Humans, being able to comprehend this precious power the Earth shares with all of its lusture of life, TO all creatures that live on it, has made Humans expand more complex subjects : politics, Science, GOD? or No GOD? greed, POWER and the urge to want more and more,

Buildings of great height,areas people gathered for worship, give thanks or some may call it, being one with yourself and communicating with a higher power, The guy that put them here for a reason? or mayne not a reason,

No one has the answer too that question, but that is the question we will keep on asking, and keep on trying to prove, and all life will one day die.

A person’s religion and faith is Sacred and Personable. Amazingly humans have been in deep thought and have been questioning their faith and will do so til they die and This place in each persons soul and their faith or whatever mindset one may have, Is shown in people who have taking their beliefs and constructed massive Buildings, Scultures, cities of architecture and paintings by people of any time is amazing to look deep into and see their

and with whatever media a person could find ,stone, marble, clay, metal…ANYTHING destructable could be reconstructed and is a piece of our history.

Sunlight, from the first day, was a important factor of our ancient relatives. Naturally human’s sleep at night, so the sun was what people woke up for, during the day was when it was safe getting around and finding food during the day. For the predators that come out at night and without all the little gadgets we have created for ourselves in this day of age, sunlight was their friend, God? It was just very important to them!
That bright glowing ball in the sky and the warmth it shoots from its rays is like a natural Euphoria, Humans and animals, like, (cats for example)a wonderful sensation awakening us as the sun rises in the early AM was a sighn for life to get up and get the day started!

It was important that man did comprehend quickly that Sunlight is one major nessecities in order for their speicies to survive. All things work with sunlight, and (darkness is just as important) in order to establish growth and flowering to take place in plants and such.

Differently and much more complex than any other life on earth, Humans took these feelings they got from the sun and other natural resources from the Earth and came up with these… intense feelings, ideas and it was a process that started with such simplicity, but has grown to be such an amazing process of how we have evolved as people.

Sunlight inspired the Art of humans and humans art is filled with complex but simple random composiitions

It was a divine and giving object that glowed high in the sky, providing all life to sprout, flourish and give to the creatures that used the nutrients as well in order to live.

Humans went from stick figure drawings to , of course want and do better, so as humans developed and learned more and more things, their ideas grew to what was UNIMAGINABLE at the time, but the strive for power, woman, understanding of what the world may be? All led to Amazing works people Thought of…decided to put it into action, and make their ideas Come true.

Light, being a single source of flame, or a big ball in the sky is a major contributer to human emotions, beauty that is so amazing it has to be captured by human eye and then recreated because beauty is eye candy. Being the source of life and the foods we eat to nourish ourselves, schedualing our lives by the time the light goes up to when it goes down, is a work of science and art not made by human, but is Admired and loved by them and is symbolized in the works people do, in whatever they are building, painting, Art history is a deep, interesting subject, and it has brought us to the type of society today, under the same sun ancient ancestors and dinosaus sunned themselves under!

Sun, light, fire, all the same substance, but has so many functions it does for everything and anything that our world maintains its Life.

Am I playing the Dada game*?

*[Dada is an art movement searching for subconscious thought and emotion through choice and chance. In the Dada game, a person thinks of a question. A second person thinks of an “answer”. The Answer person tells the group the answer. Then the first person tells the group the question. You then spend a lot of time and drink a lot of alcohol while trying to connect the answer to the question.]

June 5, 2009

Bad at Math

Posted in clues to the clueless, Semester endcap, student mistakes, student stories tagged , , , , , , at 3:00 am by profart

From a student:

Hi Prof. Art. I was in your class and I just now looked at my grades and I am really not understanding my D in the class. I did all of the assignments and participation and my grades dont look bad. I averaged them and it looks like a C to me. The only thing I dont see on there is my Final exam part 1 grade but all else looks right. I am just a little confused, I thought that class was going well and I was doing well.


So I went back and crunched the numbers. Hey, I ain’t perfect, I’ve missed a number before. But the facts remained:

In fact, Confused had missed one weeks’ worth of participation, and one assignment. Part One of the final was never opened, nor attempted, according to BlackBoard.

And in fact, the numbers crunched to a 57.

Which is an F.

December 7, 2008

Fail Season begins

Posted in student stories tagged , , , , at 4:11 am by profart

Welcome to the FAIL season. As the semester draws its final breaths, the students suddenly realize they needed to do their work, and the realities of life hit them. The begging begins. 

Gotta love my first contestant on the FAIL is Right. We had Thanksgiving Break, and nothing was due this past week. On Friday, I got this very odd (but not unusual) email: Could I please reopen the quiz from the week before break? 

No excuses, no elaboration, no discussion. Well, at least their grandmother lived this time, right? 

I replied that the assignment had been due the week before, was there a problem? 

And then comes the explanation… remember this is five days after the assignment was due… oh, they lost track of time and forgot to do it. 

This is supposed to be a family or medical emergency? 

So I said no. 

So I got another email today, how they had done the assignment on paper, but didn’t get a chance to enter it. (Remember, I got the initial email FIVE DAYS after the assignment was due). 

I am not sure how this is supposed to make it fair for all the folks who managed to get their work in on time, including those who only have online classes and therefore were taking extra-long vacations. And if you just missed the midnight deadline, wouldn’t you email your professor right away

Yes, the FAIL season is here. Season’s greetings.

October 21, 2008

Clues for the clueless #12

Posted in clues to the clueless tagged , , , at 12:18 pm by profart

Hint: In order to get an “incomplete” for a course, you first must complete some work for it.

And emailing the professor to tell him/her that other colleges allow you to do this just makes you look like an idiot. S/he knows quite well the incomplete policy is system-wide.

July 29, 2008

Clues for the Clueless #9

Posted in clues to the clueless tagged , , , at 11:18 pm by profart

Hint: if you sign up for a course, even an online course, you must actually complete the course if you want to pass the course. 

For some reason, every semester, I have 2-4 students who simply disappear in the last three weeks of a class. They stop submitting work. They stop participating in discussions. They don’t take the final exam. 

Trying to contact these students is of no avail. They do not return email. Phone messages for them go unreturned. My school doesn’t require academic advisors, so I can’t even go track them down that way (though when I am working at schools with advisors, that doesn’t usually result in contact, either). I leave messages desperate for contact, and get none. 

So I am forced to fail them. If you don’t complete a class, you fail it. It is just that simple. If I never hear from you again, nor any of your friend or relations, I can only assume you simply fell off the face of the earth and didn’t bother to do your work or contact anyone about it. College policy: Fail.

May 16, 2008

Clue to the clueless #2

Posted in clues to the clueless tagged , , at 2:06 am by profart

Hint: classes begin with the first day of classes. That date is listed in the course schedule, on the college website (see the Academic Calendar), and in BlackBoard. I would think you would have checked that information when you registered to take a class so you could do appropriate time management planning. Online courses are no exception to this rule. 

Emailing your professor asking when classes begin is a big red flag for high risk future FAIL.